Sunday, September 11, 2011


I don't have Microsoft Office on my Mac right now. 

The geniuses at iCity formatted my Mac and didn't reinstall it with the update. I'm upset. I haven't caught a break all summer. Every single plan I made fell through, and here I was thinking getting this piece of shit laptop fixed would help me make up for lost time, but no. Nothing's changed; I'm as stranded as I was a week ago. It's almost 4 in the morning now, and I'm tired but I can't sleep. I stumbled upon Madonna's 'X-Static Process' a few days ago and so I've been listening to it on repeat for a while now. I'm not going to embed the video because no one reads this thing, and I highly doubt anyone who does actually watches the videos I feature. So, there's that.  Honestly, I haven't been this stressed since senior year. Not stressed because I was pushing myself to succeed, but stressed because I was anticipating the shit storm my academic neglect would lead to. This is literally my last shot. If I don't make this happen, I going to find myself on the wrong side of twenty with nothing to show for the past two years. 

In the midst of all my self-pity and drawn-out angst, I had a moment of clarity. A profound moment in which a I realized a truth I'd been pondering for a while now.

If I were a boy, it wouldn't be so much that I would have fewer problems than I do as a girl.

I'd simply have more escapes.

On that note, I bid you all a better night than what I'm having.


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