Friday, July 30, 2010

I've Got A Bun In The Oven!


I could however explain to you in (utterly boring) detail the process with which bread is made. See, it's quite simple really, it's all about the fermentation process. The fluffy, light texture you're likely to associate with bread is directly linked to the production of carbon dioxide as the heat from an oven activates the yeast that is vital to this process...Bored yet?
I'll fill you in on a slice of my life before you throw me in an oven; today I got news that I have been accepted in KU into the Biology program! Really...the applause isn't necessary.
To make a long story short, I'm going to be attending KU for the next year, and if everything goes well, I'll be jetting off to Ireland next year to learn the art of healing. Expect many posts, pictures (with inappropriate captions, of course) and funny tales from what I hope is going to be an amazing, educational and all out fun year.

Sharpening my wit and dulling my senses,


PS - If you hear angry villagers, and see smoke and pitch-forks come September 26, don't'll just be my first day.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The Power of Punctuation

A woman without her man is nothing.

A woman, without her man, is nothing.

A woman: without her, man is nothing.

Stroke your beards to that,


PS - I have trouble believing that we are the same species as Lynda Carter. *Sighs, heads back to stationary bike*

Friday, July 23, 2010

It's Not Just About Shoulder Pads

One notion that I've never been fully able to grasp is the concept of "Good Families". What I mean by this, is often times when someone's character is called into question the first manner in which such claims will be shrugged off is a quickie reply of "No, but he/she is from a good family..."
Don't get me wrong, I am well aware that Kuwait is home to many influential and revered families, but if you have respectable families, doesn't that also mean you must also have unrespectable families? What criteria would qualify someone to fall under the latter group?

I'm not really trying to make a point here, just thinking out loud on a Saturday morning with a hot cup of tea.

Sipping cautiously,


Tuesday, July 20, 2010

I've Got A (Sick?) Obsession

(Go ahead, drum your fingers along to this know you love it.)

To quote Ke$ha, "I've got a sick obsession...". No, I'm not addicted to drawing on my face like the Pop princess. If I have markers in my hand, we all lose. What I mean to say is that these past two years have found me becoming obsessed with all things Kuwait. From the fashions, to the vernacular to the social "rituals" (Starbucks mating game...yeah, I know about that), Kuwait has me held captive with its buzzing fluorescent culture. The cherry on top of this situation must be how seamlessly the Kuwaiti youth have incorporated stereotypically North American tokens of Pop Culture and reinvented them as their own. Sheik Ray Ban anyone?
Myself, I'm a very dramatic figure, which is perhaps why I find myself fascinated with the overly trendy culture the general Kuwaiti youth identify with. With the neon accessories and matte phones, I find myself left with plenty to look at and analyze.

Buffing my Ray Bans to a royal shine,

What's In A Name?

If you cast a quick glance at the address bar on the top of your browser (I'm a Safari girl myself), you'll see I've chosen "The Expatess" as the moniker under which my blog will exist. The genesis for this name is either dull or interesting, depending on your taste. In any case, I'll elaborate and allow you to play judge to my crime in taste.
One aspect of Kuwaiti culture I've always been well acquainted with is the ritual-like consumption of tea. As a child, I recall my Father drinking tea (mixed with condensed milk) at breakfast every morning. I would vigorously lie to myself , and pretend that his preferred morning beverage was an emulation of the Brits' affinity for tea. Sadly, time passed and fantasies faded; I realized that my Dad wasn't merely being posh, he was also being his Kuwaiti self.
Before I continue to digress all the way into oblivion, I'll explain the name. As a kid with skinned knees, I recall many stormy nights spent watching The X-Files, completely enthralled with the eerie adventures of Mulder and Scully (Fact: I will always love David Duchovny). Recently teased as being an "expatriate" in my own country, I lopped off the latter half of the word, added the female suffix of "-ess" and here we are today. Seeing as how I plan on filing all my otherworldly university experience in this virtual cabinet, I thought my little play on words was appropriate. That explains the name of the blog. What it doesn't explain is why I don't have an estikana in my hand.

Running to the sound of the kettle screeching,


Formal Introductions

In a few months time, September to be accurate, I will begin my life as a student at Kuwait University. Before I begin my high-brow ramblings (an effort to document my freshman year), allow me to introduce the legend that will be.

Overtly opinionated, old enough to vote in any North American country and living my life in utter submission to the work of Larry David. That's me in a nutshell.
Raised by an amazing Kuwaiti father and a loving Syrian mother, Canada was where I spent my sunny childhood outdoors, unaware that I was, or rather am, a Kuwaiti. My family and I moved back to the old country around two years ago, and it's been quite the ride ever since.

The concept of this virtual diary is not to spend immense amounts of time critiquing Kuwait and it's culture, but rather to try and find a way of reconciling my Canadian upbringing, mindset and tendencies with a culture that is an inevitable part of who I am.

Heading out to pick up a tube of neon pink lipstick that seems to be all the rage round these parts,